Baby Got Book

I like big books and I cannot lie
You other readers can’t deny
That a book’s sum total worth
Is tied up in its girth
And you’re hooked, wanna pull out your change
‘Cause you notice that the spine’s got range,
Not just an inch upon the shelf–
It’s got a zipcode to itself!
Oh, Melville, I wanna get witcha
Don’t care if you got no picture.
My professor tried to warn me,
Told me Les Miserables was way too corny
But a cosette you know it’s not–
And big books make me hot.
I page turn, page turn
‘Til the ends of my fingers burn.
Can’t help that my reading,
Resembles piranhas feeding
I’m fierce, and I pierce,
As I tear through Ambrose Bierce.
Can’t stand no magazine–
Pretending it’s a weighty thing?
Take an English lit geek and ask him that,
Man’s got no use for tracts.

Baby’s got book.

A word to the thick book writah–
I won’t hate or fight ya
But I gotta be straight when I say
I wanna read ’till the break of dawn.
Man-u-script got it going on.
A lot of dopes won’t like this song,
‘Cause them punks like to skip it and Cliff it,
And I’d rather read all day.
You’re long, but I’m strong,
And I’m down to get my fiction on.

Baby’s got book.